quotes from the street

“isn’t he keeping you for the summer?”
overheard: Chartered Yacht, South of Spain
context: one hired escort to the other as she departed from the holiday

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englishman: “so what do you do here in london?”
russian girl: “umm, sex, shopping, sex, shopping, nikki beach”
overheard: London, UK
context: russian girl to englishman at a club 

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“oh i know – it’s like a pacemaker for me … surprised i didn’t drop dead the moment i got more than 50 feet away from it!”
overheard: #14 bus, London
context: a guy to his friend on forgetting his blackberry at home

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“ramavich, or whatever he’s called – now he has a liner that’s to die for!”
overheard: Holland Park, London
context: a posh elderly couple discussing roman abramovich’s yacht in the park

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“i’m going to make you look hip and western!”
overheard: Manhattan, NYC
context: an english hairstylist to japanese client whilst cutting her hair

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“me stomach can’t take black coffee and i’m off the dairy so i guess i’ll have a lager”
overheard: Sliema, Malta
context: fat english woman tourist to her husband at a cafe at 09:00 in the morning

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spanish friend: “you know how in england it’s friday the 13th that’s unlucky? well, in spain we do it on tuesday the 13th”
english friend: “wait, so, like, when it’s friday in london it’s actually tuesday in spain? like you operate on a different calendar?”
Overheard: Starbucks, London
Context: two girls chatting in the queue at Starbucks

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“even I flew business class to come here … and it’s not that bad”
context: CEO of large arab bank speaking to his employees on the plane
overheard: London to Paris, British Airways

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“ohhh ya, that was the night i had late night snacks with those trannys!”
overheard: London, UK
context: two girls chatting at starbucks

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dinner guest #1 “germany, do they have a president or a prime minister? i can’t remember”
dinner guest #2 “hmmm, i can’t recall either - i think they have a president - non?”
dinner guest #3 “oh oh, i know, they have a fuhrer – he’s called mein fuhrer!”
*lengthy awkward silence*
overheard: gstaad, switzerland
context: discussion at a dinner party as to what [...]

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“she says she went to a top plastic surgeon, but it looks to me like she went to her local vet”
overheard: Sliema, Malta
context: two ladies having lunch

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