quotes from the street

“of course, but you know charlotte, the money i make at JP Morgan is merely a drop in the ocean compared to the money my family has”
overheard: Tramp, London
context: a banker courting his evening’s prey

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20 something guy #1: “so what do you want to do tonight?”
20 something guy #2: “i dunno, but i wanna do something dirty and i want to get laid”
overheard: Builders Arms, London
context: two twenty something guys discussing their intentions for saturday evening

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brazilian: “why don’t you come to Rio with us for carnival”
german: “i’d love to, but i have a girlfriend”
brazilian: “well, take her with you”
german: “why would anyone take a log to the woods?”
overheard: Madrid, Spain
context: German and a Brazilian at a coffee shop

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“don’t you fucking walk away from me you wanker!”
overheard: Picadilly Circus, London
context: a rather scary chav to her comparatively shrimpy boyfriend

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girl: “hi. um, i’m meghan”
guy: “meghan, i’m flattered but i’ve heard enough of your conversation with your friend to know that you’re an idiot”
overheard: Charlotte, North Carolina
context: guy to a girl in a bar after she woefully made an approach

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girl 1: “and then i found out he was totally effing someone else!”
girl 2: “omigod, he was f*cking someone else?!”
girl 1: “oh no no, effing, you know, facebooking?!”
overheard: London, UK
context: two girls on the bus discussing their sorted social media affairs

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“it’s like finding out santa claus doesn’t exist!”
overheard: Mayfair, London
context: two 20 something girls discussing monogamy and the increasingly obvious lack of it

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guy #1: “i think that girl wants to go home with you”
guy #2: “i would never go home with the kind of girl who would go home with me”
overheard: Charlotte, NC
context: two friends at a club scoping the room

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“i’m all about making deposits in the emotional bank account”
overheard: London, UK
context: guy to his colleagues whilst purchasing flowers for his girlfriend

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“i don’t really think before i speak – i just kind of put the words together and go for it”
location: Starbucks, London
context: boyfriend to his girlfriend after saying something rather thoughtless

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“you give her a compliment – she’ll run away with another man!”
overheard: London, UK
context: a guy to his friends on why he doesn’t flatter his girlfriend

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“oh, and if my boyfriend asks – i do NOT know how to do this”
overheard: London, UK
context: girl to her friend as she changed a light bulb

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“sorry about last night, i think i owe you a bunch of flowers for all that putting up with me … by the way, how did that banana end up in my shoe?”
overheard: balans, london
context: guy to girl at brunch of shame

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flatmate #1 “where have you been?”
flatmate #2 “ohhhhh, you know … just shagging!”
flatmate #1 “ohh gawd, really?”
flatmate #2 “ya, really nice girl called anna – only mistake she made was shagging me!”
overheard: london, uk
context: twenty something lad to his flatmate after a night out
 

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“blokes are legends and girls are slags – just think, you could be a legend maker!”
overheard: london, uk
context: guy to girl on the tube

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“you now come to a crossroad:
continental lovers
OR
a horrible carbon footprint”
overheard: london, uk
context: two girls discussing their long distance affairs

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“let’s play marriage. you stand there & you stand there…(pause)..this is stupid”
overheard: on the playground, U.S.
context: two children playing together in the school yard

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“why don’t you pop a Viagra darling, and i’ll throw you a quickie.”
overheard: promenade des anglais, nice, france
context: an older woman to her even older husband at a café

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city boy on mobile to girlfriend: “ok, lots of love – bye!”
friend of city boy: “do you think she’ll find out”
city boy : “god, i hope not”
overheard: #14 bus, London
context: city boy says to his friend as he gets off mobile with (pressumed) girlfriend

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“he married four times – always to a girl called Margaret. Said it made life so much simpler, particularly at passionate moments”
overheard: dinner party, chelsea, london
context: friends reminscing over the wonderfully colourful life of a dearly departed friend 

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