quotes from the street

guy #1: “in the Britney/Christina whore-off, the Dirrty video was like Hiroshima”

guy#2: “so does that make Nagasaki the ‘Oooops i did it again’ of international conflict?”

overheard: Cambridge University, England

context: two gay guys walking through Newnham College (an all-girls college), wishing they lived there

“of course, but you know charlotte, the money i make at JP Morgan is merely a drop in the ocean compared to the money my family has”

overheard: Tramp, London

context: a banker courting his evening’s prey

20 something guy #1: “so what do you want to do tonight?”

20 something guy #2: “i dunno, but i wanna do something dirty and i want to get laid”

overheard: Builders Arms, London

context: two twenty something guys discussing their intentions for saturday evening

father #1 : “my kids call me Um”

father #2: “how’s that?”

father #1: “Like, Um, i need some money”

overheard: Valletta, Malta

context: dinner party discussion on how kids talk to their parents

brazilian: “why don’t you come to Rio with us for carnival”

german: “i’d love to, but i have a girlfriend”

brazilian: “well, take her with you”

german: “why would anyone take a log to the woods?”

overheard: Madrid, Spain

context: German and a Brazilian at a coffee shop

“don’t you fucking walk away from me you wanker!”

overheard: Picadilly Circus, London

context: a rather scary chav to her comparatively shrimpy boyfriend

“it’s because they don’t use cynicism as a tool for power – which is something the english do so well”

overheard: train from southampton to london

context: an english girl describing what she loves about Americans

“there is a broken train in front of us that can’t be moved … so we’ll be here for ages, probably, i think”

overheard: London Underground, London

context: train driver over the intercom to passengers on the district line

“ya, um, sorry – it’s just that i totally don’t believe in the whole ’save the environment’ thing”

overheard: London, UK

context: an office manager to staff in regards to printing less paper

girl: “hi. um, i’m meghan”

guy: “meghan, i’m flattered but i’ve heard enough of your conversation with your friend to know that you’re an idiot”

overheard: Charlotte, North Carolina

context: guy to a girl in a bar after she woefully made an approach

girl 1: “and then i found out he was totally effing someone else!”

girl 2: “omigod, he was f*cking someone else?!”

girl 1: “oh no no, effing, you know, facebooking?!”

overheard: London, UK

context: two girls on the bus discussing their sorted social media affairs

“i’ll learn to speak chinese before i learn to speak woman”

overheard: The Wellington, London

context: one twenty something guy to a girl

“two bottles of crystal – one drink, one spray”

overheard: Tramp, London

context: a russian guy explaining his bottle selection to the table one over

five year old: “daaaaad….”

father: “yes choppy?”

five year old: “you know when you’re head grows, does your brain get bigger by magic?”

overheard: Rickmansworth, London

context: five year old to his father

girl: “and you, where are you from?”

guy: “well, i’m half french, half greek – i’m a freak!”

overheard: Chelsea, London

context: two twenty-somethings chatting at a party

“i can’t see you darling, but i can tell you’re gorgeous by the sound of your voice”

overheard: Toronto, Canada

context: a blind man to a young woman at a dinner party

“quit your whining kev or you’re not getting macky d’s for dinner!”

overheard: Primark, Oxford Circus

context: chav mum to her son whilst shopping as he complained he was hungry

“it’s like finding out santa claus doesn’t exist!”

overheard: Mayfair, London

context: two 20 something girls discussing monogamy and the increasingly obvious lack of it

“i’d rather live like a king than be one”

overheard: Saba Island, Caribbean

context: a carribean taxi driver/real estate agent/tour guide to a family on their holiday

“you must be very careful when you cuddle an octopus, or it might keep you”

location: Rickmansworth, London

context: a five year old’s insight whilst watching a wildlife programme on the BBC